Four dollars for a box of sweet, minty joy was more than enough for me. In a place that is drab on even the most colorful of days, you'll take whatever form of happiness you can find. The girls seemed genuinely happy to have yet another sale; I'm sure they're doing just fine and my contribution is just another five dollar bill added to their wad.
Thin Mints. I bought Thin Mints. The last time I had these delicious babies were when I was home and I hid them in the freezer (right next to the Nutella so dad can only get a little bit out of the jar). I guess I'm just overly sentimental right now; everything seems to make me think of my friends and the house that I grew up in and the summers and blah blah blah... I've already gone down this road. I've realized these things, but I've also looked to see that this part of my life is going to be an adventure more than anything else.
I feel like I've said that a lot. I probably (definitely) have, and I think I do this because it is the big thing keeping me going. If I went to literally any other school, there would be no chance in hell that I would put myself through calculus or physics, because I never felt confident enough in my mathematical abilities to even attempt these subjects. Now that I am here, and I don't have any alternative, I'm doing my best and things are actually going pretty well. Right now I have an A and a B respectively, and I pray to Jeebus that I can keep up the status quo.
I think that the change in scenery (Wilton ---> Castine) and sudden thrusting into a different lifestyle changed me, or at least a little part of me anyway. I am without a doubt more independent now, but I think that living with mostly (white, republican, and maybe-not-the-most-open-minded) dudes has also trained me to bite my tongue more than I once would. I'm going to be with these people for two semesters straight, and learning to deal with differing personalities hasn't been the easiest situation for me.
I don't support DT, but many people here do. I guess I can empathize with what they feel toward the current day political situation, but I'd like to think that the ethics that I've been brought up on by both the church and my parents make me want to help more than I hurt (or at least attempt to do so). That isn't necessarily the way many people here feel here, in spite of what they chose to call themselves. I guess my methodology doesn't truly line up with what they feel, and by George that is okay. The world appears to be as tempestuous as ever. The attacks around the world, various wars, and changing political climate are creating a place that the current generation has to deal with. I don't have an answer to how we will change these things for the better, but I do know that good faith and human nature isn't something to be wasted.
The world will always have evil in it. Big people in high places will use power to justify their actions, right or wrong. The thing that makes us human is our ability to respond to this; humanity makes itself apparent when tragedy strikes and our friends need help. The human struggle is to eke out an existence that means something to the individual and benefits those that they hold most dear to them. Now that I think about it, that last line pretty much disqualifies the first sentence of this paragraph, but that is okay. Once one realize that we all want this for ourselves, we can begin to empathize with those around us. So, DT, I guess I do see where you are coming from. You seek to make life better and more enjoyable for yourself and your family, just as I would. I can't say that you're my choice of a candidate, but I realize you're human. In your humanity, you've distorted what it means to help those around you by specific... but that is another post.
I probably won't have a lasting impact on this earth. What I can do, however, is quantify what is going on around me and strive to do my part in making that 'something' better. It would be remiss of me to say that I help at every opportunity I get; my life has never been so presently self-important than right now (I spend most of my days thinking only about what I have to do). This ins't a bad thing, but it is the reality of the situation. I don't have the means to dive into social reform right now, but I will down the road. The when and where are yet to be determined, I just need to be receptive.
I've been thinking a lot lately, so expect another post soon.
AF
